Context: The Missing Piece of the Puzzle
con·text
ˈkäntekst/
noun
1. the circumstances that form the setting for an event, statement, or idea, and in terms of which it can be fully understood and assessed.
Where did context go? Why doesn't it seem necessary any longer? And why do we feel okay springing into action when it's absent?
It seems that lately no matter what type of communication we engage in—main stream media, social media, or one-on-one conversations—we take the liberty of ignoring facts. Even worse, we seem to be okay receiving only one-sided information.
We tend to gravitate only towards the information we want to hear. This trend has become ubiquitous and the truly scary part is that I believe we do this almost unconsciously. But why?
Maybe it's the fast pace of communication, the amount of content being thrown our way, or the deluge of constant messages popping up on our social media notifications—each one vying for our immediate attention. Perhaps it's easier to exist in a fantasy world where information and perspectives perfectly match our own ideas of how the world "should" work than it is to digest reality and its varying and messy differences of opinion.
No matter what the reason, a society without context is a society ignorant of reality. When we exist in this state of un-reality, we are robbed of the opportunity to achieve peace, harmony, and mutual understanding through our daily interactions.
No matter the forum, both sides of the aisle are guilty of this self-inflicted ailment. And we seem to continue accepting half the story without question. We all need to realize that a lack of context only creates confusion, diversion, and distrust in politics, society, and in our interpersonal relationships.
Through the years, in my own experience, I’ve often been approached by either a family member or a friend to be the intermediary between sensitive information they have been privy to, about another person. Usually, the actions they want me to take are ones that they themselves don’t feel comfortable taking, and they approach me under the guise that the desired message or probing “would be better accepted coming from you.” Often the issue comes with misinformation based on a rumor or a half-baked story, and only with some reflection do I realize that what I'm really being asked to do is push their agenda for them.
Asking to become the messenger of a message or an experience that is not your own is never a good idea; the messenger, more often than not, does not fair well and can damage relationships and reputations unintentionally.
Just recently I was asked for advice on how a person in this very situation should work through it. My response took the form of a few questions:
Do you know the context in which the events of this situation unfolded?
Do you know what the person that’s asking you to perform this task at hand really wants? Or what that person chose to take away from that exchange before conveying it back to you?
Do you know what’s at stake for you if you agree to move forward or the harm that it may cause to the person or to your relationship with them?
If the answer to these questions is no, then why are you agreeing to be the messenger of a message you don't have context for?
The advice seeker responded "the person who asked me to speak out was sure that the message would be better received coming from me."
At that point, I had only one more question: Better for whom?
This final question really gave the advice-seeker an "aha" moment that made her realize that the conversation truly wasn't about advice, nor was it about the well-being of another. This was about a rumor that had already been accepted as "fact." People were acting on incomplete information and had already sprung to action with little regard for the damage that could potentially be caused. They were expecting others to do the same, regardless of the consequences.
Parts of this story may ring true for you. Maybe you've been approached by someone to discuss a situation you didn't have the full story about, or maybe you were the person initiating a conversation with only half the facts. Usually it's only in hindsight that we realize the messenger never accomplishes anything except sowing more confusion and distrust while running the risk of damaging their own relationships.
The next time you hear a piece of information, take on the task of probing a little deeper to see how much more information you can gather. Make the effort to ensure you're receiving a complete message and don't become the messenger of a half-baked, biased message. Get as much context as you can before you make an assessment, form an opinion, pass judgment, or—even worse—take action based on assumptions.
Context may be eluding us. But before it's completely dead, we must make an effort to tease it out. Our daily lives, and the lives of everyone we engage with, will be better if we always try to get the whole story before we act.